i was very excited to catch mark kozelek in san francisco again at the stunning great american music hall, particularly since i've just moved back to the bay area from new york. that said, i must admit that my enjoyment of saturday's show stemmed from mostly personal reasons. i have been a fan of mark kozelek's songwriting and music for the last 15 years or so, and at this point, his luminous voice, heart-stopping lyrics, and sublime chords are tethered to my core in a way that can never come unstitched. i will forever be grateful to have his music in my life, but over the last few years, his live performances have often left me frustrated. he generally manages to sneak in a song or two that, for me, greatly redeem the set even when he forgets/repeats the lyrics ["all mixed up" is an example from saturday] because the song itself and the memory of that song--of when i first heard it, of the countless times i've heard it since, and how it still tends to melt even the parts of my heart that i thought recent months had frozen over--is so perfect and powerful that i don't think it could ever be diminished....but i wish that he'd actually play his songs the way he wrote/recorded them sometimes. wanting that, i can't help but wonder if i'm just a selfish fan. i mean i should feel privileged to know his music at all, but on the other hand, i feel for the new/newish fans. every show i saw of his/rhp in the 90s was absolute magic from start to finish [albeit a bit tense at times], and now it's like we only see glimmers of what could be. at one point, i jokingly whispered to my friend, "is he just getting old?" but i really don't think age has anything to do with it, at least not in the physical sense. but maybe passion does dull a bit as we grow older? i can only pray that is not the case, but, in his case, i don't know how else to explain it.
anyway, please excuse the useless nature of this post. i just wanted to chime in because although his performance certainly could have been more focused and inspired, the show truly made my bittersweet homecoming a lot sweeter.
thank you for reading,
rayna
p.s. [i am guessing the parties responsible for such egregious behaviour will not read this, but...] to the people who were standing behind me and who i finally worked up the nerve to talk to, it is NOT okay to converse incessantly during an acoustic set--or any show for that matter. why even bother coming??